The log-line, as it is, tells a mini-version of the story, which sounds like it would be a good story. However, this is not what a log-line should do. It should, I think, end with some form of suspense. For example, in this case, "disappearing without a trace" makes it sound like the story actually ends that way. It would be better to hint, perhaps, at Henry Berry Lowrie running toward freedom, with the Klan in pursuit. Or some other such open-ended declaration, with no implication of how the story ends. (Whether the story does end this way or not doesn't matter -- the log-line should make it sound as if he might disappear forever or he might get caught by, say, a large, wrathful contingent of Klan members committed to finding and killing Henry Berry at all costs.)..
Posted August 9, 2014, 11:16 am by William Trenton
The log-line, as it is, tells a mini-version of the story, which sounds like it would be a good story. However, this is not what a log-line should do. It should, I think, end with some form of suspense. For example, in this case, "disappearing without a trace" makes it sound like the story actually ends that way. It would be better to hint, perhaps, at Henry Berry Lowrie running toward freedom, with the Klan in pursuit. Or some other such open-ended declaration, with no implication of how the story ends. (Whether the story does end this way or not doesn't matter -- the log-line should make it sound as if he might disappear forever or he might get caught by, say, a large, wrathful contingent of Klan members committed to finding and killing Henry Berry at all costs.)..